Why do so many Christians have difficulty in understanding that Jesus told us not to judge each other but rather to love one another and forgive those who do wrong?
I won't go into details but suffice it to say that I know of someone who has probably done wrong and the attitudes of some members, of more than one church have been completely un-Christian in response.
By all means Christians, like any other, should take steps to ensure that the temptation and ability to do wrong again is removed or limited, but Jesus taught us to do no harm, to show love and forgiveness instead.
How do we reconcile Jesus's exhortations and statements with making someones transgressions public, calling for their livelihood to be threatened, ruining their reputation?
Jesus said (Matthew 18:15) that there is a process to be followed if you are wronged. A process that involves trying to resolve differences peacefully and discretely, without causing further harm. So, if someone wrongs you, discuss it with them first. If they will still not make things right, take just a couple of friends or fellow members of the church to try to persuade them. If that fails then take it to the church. Only then, if they refuse to cease wronging you, do you go to the law and make the matter public. That only applies to on-going, serious matters. Peter asked Jesus how many times he should forgive someone who sinned against him. Seven times? he asked. Jesus replied "No, not seven times, seventy-seven times!". If someone has stopped doing you harm, you forgive them.
Jesus told the parable of the unmerciful servant who owed money to his master. He begged his master for release from his debt. That master took pity on the servant and did release him from the debt. However, that ungrateful man went to his fellows and assaulted him, demanding the money he himself was owed. This servant also begged for release from his debt but instead was thrown into jail! When the master heard of this he was angry that the first servant had begged for and received release from his own debts but been harsh with his fellow. So the unmerciful one was also thrown in jail and tortured. Jesus was most explicit: If you do not forgive the sins of your fellow men and women here on earth, God will treat you just as harshly as the master did the unmerciful servant.
We ask it every time we say the Lord's Prayer: "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us". We have no right to hope for forgiveness if we can not forgive those who do harm to us or our communities.
Some have argued that Jesus did not speak against judging others, that the well known "Judge not, lest ye also be judged" is actually just a call to be consistent i.e. to only judge by the rules that you too are willing to be judged by. But the context of Jesus's quote indicates that shows clearly that he was saying don't judge at all. He goes on to ask how you can comment on the sawdust speck in your brothers eye and ignore the plank in your own? In other words, we are all sinful in some way - ALL of us - it is wrong to judge the faults of others and not forgive them, when we too carry faults, many of which may be far worse.
Then there is the most famous of all of these exhortations not to judge and do harm to others simply because you think they are at fault: "Let he amongst you, who is without sin, cast the first stone". Again there are those who wriggle and say that Jesus didn't actually mean that we should forgive adulterers, he simply wanted to point out the hypocrisy of those accusing the woman, or he thought it was unfair that she was to be stoned when the man she must have been with, was not. But this does not fit with every other case in which Jesus says "Do not judge", "Forgive!". Jesus was quite able and perfectly willing to directly tell the Pharisees that they were hypocrites or the reason for his disagreement with their actions. Instead he told them that they should not judge and condemn, because they too are sinners.
Repeatedly, Jesus says that he wants mercy and forgiveness above sacrifice and punishment. Even if that means the breaking of the written Law, as in the adulteress case. He is the law, he came to clarify the true Law and free it from the restrictions imposed by the supposedly righteous Pharisees. He is the one we, as Christians, follow. His message of love, compassion and forgiveness transcend all. He himself indicated that the condemnation and punishment of the Old Testament were wrong - "You have heard that it was written 'eye-for-eye, tooth-for-tooth' but I tell you it is better not to resist the evil person". The greatest Law is Love, love for God and then Love for each other.
Incidentally, does this mean we should have no trials or jails? I do not believe so. We can not function as a society without the rule of law. However, we are duty bound, as Christians, to act with love. Both toward the accused and guilty, and to society. We should just forgive where we can and only impose those restrictions that are of absolute necessity if we can not just let someone's behaviour go unregarded. We should limit harm, even to the guilty, and treat all with love and compassion.
